Showing posts with label dumb. Show all posts
Showing posts with label dumb. Show all posts

Friday, March 21, 2008

Tech support : revisited

Here's some additions to the tech support jokes that was posted in this blog before. I thought it'd be easier to make new post rather than adding the jokes into the already-long original tech support posting. so, enjoy!

p/s-click HERE to read the previous compilations on tech support jokes :)



Helpdesk: What kind of computer do you have?

Customer: A white one...

====

Customer: Hi, this is Celine. I can't get my diskette out.

Helpdesk: Have you tried pushing the button ?

Customer: Yes, but it's really stuck.

Helpdesk: That doesn't sound good; I'll make a note ...

Customer: No ... wait a minute... I hadn't inserted it yet... it's still

on my desk... sorry .

====

Helpdesk: Click on the 'my computer' icon on to the left of the screen.

Customer: Your left or my left ?

====

Helpdesk: Good day. How may I help you ?

Male customer: Hello... I can't print.

Helpdesk: Would you click on start for me and ...

Customer: Listen pal; don't start getting technical on me ! I'm not Bill

Gates damn it !

====

Hi good afternoon, this is Martha, I can't print. Every time I try it

says 'Can't find printer'. I've even lifted the printer and placed it in

front of the monitor, but the computer still says he can't find it...

====

Customer: I have problems printing in red...

Helpdesk: Do you have a colour printer ?

Customer: No.

====

Helpdesk: What's on your monitor now ma'am ?

Customer: A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me in the supermarket.

====

Helpdesk: And now hit F8.

Customer: It's not working.

Helpdesk: What did you do, exactly ?

Customer: I hit the F-key 8-times as you told me, but nothing's

happening.

====

Customer: My keyboard is not working anymore.

Helpdesk: Are you sure it's plugged into the computer ?

Customer: No. I can't get behind the computer.

Helpdesk: Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back.

Customer: OK

Helpdesk: Did the keyboard come with you ?

Customer: Yes

Helpdesk: That means the keyboard is not plugged in. Is there another

keyboard ?

Customer: Yes, there's another one here. Ah...that one does work !

====

Helpdesk: Your password is the small letter a as in apple, a capital

letter V as in Victor, the number 7.

Customer: Is that 7 in capital letters?

====

A customer couldn't get on the internet.

Helpdesk: Are you sure you used the right password ?

Customer: Yes I'm sure. I saw my colleague do it.

Helpdesk: Can you tell me what the password was ?

Customer: Five stars.

====

Helpdesk: What antivirus program do you use ?

Customer: Netscape.

Helpdesk: That's not an antivirus program.

Customer: Oh, sorry...Internet Explorer.

====

Customer: I have a huge problem. A friend has placed a screensaver on my

computer, but every time I move the mouse, it disappears !

====

Helpdesk: Microsoft Tech. Support, may I help you ?

Customer: Good afternoon! I have waited over 4 hours for you. Can you

please tell me how long it will take before you can help me ?

Helpdesk: Uhh..? Pardon, I don't understand your problem ?

Customer: I was working in Word and clicked the help button more than 4

hours ago. Can you tell me when you will finally be helping me ?

====

Helpdesk: How may I help you ?

Customer: I'm writing my first e-mail.

Helpdesk: OK, and, what seems to be the problem ?

Customer: Well, I have the letter a, but how do I get the circle around

it ?

Tuesday, February 19, 2008

Funny News...True Stories

Read this newspaper articles. They were all trues stories.



Gay Cannot Fly!!!




Caught Yourself Speeding????



Guinea de La Noche



Bad Guys Wanted!!!



So FRESH You'd Swear over It!



Don't Judge a Baby by His Name



When the Car Turns Cold...



Rocked and Rolled



Dead, and Once Again



Me, Kitty and Ourselves



Dumb and Dumber and Dumber and Dumber...(repeat 59,054,087 times)



Soup of the Day